Did you hear about the gourmet who avoids unfashionable restaurants because he doesn't want to gain weight in the wrong places?
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Why are most horses in shape? Because they are on a stable diet.
If we’re not meant to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the fridge?
A funny thing with a diet, the second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day you’re off it.
My fitness goal is to get down to what I told the DMV I weigh.
If you are what you eat … I need to eat a skinny person.
I finally heard some good news. I’m not overweight. I’m undertall. What a relief!
You have a Slim-Fast for breakfast, a Slim-Fast for lunch; then, you eat a “sensible dinner.” How sensible are you going to be after eating powder all day?
Q: When should you go on a cheese diet?
A: If you need to cheddar few pounds.