The only difference in my life when I’m on a diet is instead of saying, “I ate nachos,” I say, “I accidentally ate nachos.”—@behindyourback
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Q: What do you call a dumb omnivore?
A: A meathead!
My fitness coach told me to bend down and touch my toes. I said, “I don’t have that kind of relationship with my feet. Can I just wave?” —@KerryKatona7
Q: When should you go on a cheese diet?
A: If you need to cheddar few pounds.
Most people gain weight by having intimate dinners for two…alone. —”Laugh Yourself Healthy,” by Charles Hunter
I have removed all the food from the house. It was delicious
Wouldn’t it be so great if we could put ourselves in the dryer for 10 minutes and come out wrinkle free and three sizes smaller?
Definition of Calories: Tiny creatures colonizing your closet. They sew your clothes a little bit tighter every night.
You don’t lose much weight, but from a distance your friends think you look thinner!