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Do you live in the Nicest Place in America?

New Behind

Last New Year's Eve found me in the hospital scheduled for an operation to remove hemorrhoids. So while others donned party hats and sipped champagne, I wore a hospital gown and swigged painkillers. That's not to say the holiday spirit was completely absent.

The next day, January 1, I woke up to a banner on my bedroom wall. It screamed "Happy New Rear!"