Q: Why does vegan cheese taste bad?
A: It hasn't been tested on mice.
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Hey, Lady! Want to drop 5 pounds? Let go of the purse.
Why did the diet coach send her clients to the paint store?
She heard you could get thinner there.
One of the benefits of eating salad is that you can eat tons of it and never be satisfied.
What do you call someone who can’t stick with a diet? A desserter.
It took a lot of willpower, but I finally gave up dieting.
The only difference in my life when I’m on a diet is instead of saying “I ate nachos,” I say “I accidentally ate nachos.”
A successful diet is the triumph of mind over platter.
If we’re not meant to have midnight snacks, why is there a light in the fridge?