A funny thing with a diet, the second day of a diet is always easier than the first. By the second day you're off it.
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I know it’s three meals a day, but how many should I eat at night?
Q: Did you hear about the hungry clock?
A: He went back four seconds.
It took a lot of will power. But I finally gave up dieting.
If you are what you eat … I need to eat a skinny person.
D.I.E.T. = Did I Eat That?
I wish I could lose weight as easily as I lose my keys, pen, cell phone, temper, and my mind.
I have fillings in my teeth. My refrigerator magnets keep pulling me to the kitchen. That’s why I can’t lose weight.
It took a lot of willpower, but I finally gave up dieting.