Remembering the good times
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The best thing about good old days is that we were neither good nor old.
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I bought some batteries, but they weren’t included.
I always have trouble remembering three things: faces, names, and—I can’t remember what the third thing is.—Fred Allen
Where there’s a will, there’s a relative.
The four most beautiful words in our common language:
I told you so.
I work out religiously—Christmas and Easter.
Submitted by comedian Matthew Wohlfarth
My greatest acting performance is when I check the caller ID, then adopt an air of polite curiosity as
I answer the phone “Hello?”
During a recent meeting of our Optimist Club, we challenged one another to come up with an inspirational sentence using the word countenance. This was the winning entry: "I put a cheerful countenance on people every day." It was … Read More