How the Tables Have Turned
I thought I won the argument with my wife as to how to arrange the dining room furniture.
But when I got home the tables were turned.
More Jokes
Bad Things to Tell Your Wife
A commercial boasted that its product could help people live pain-free in their golden years.
“Am I in my golden years?” my wife, 63, asked.
“Not at all,” I assured her. “But you are yellowing fast.”
Dennis McClanahan, Buckner, Missouri
Men Never Listen
My girlfriend was complaining last night that I never listen to her. Or something like that…
My wife says I’m unsophisticated…
My wife says I’m unsophisticated and uncultured, so to prove her wrong, guess where I’m taking her. Hint: It starts with “B” and rhymes with “wallet.”
Brad Hamer, on ruminate.com
Husband on the Phone
I rang the doctor and said, “Quick! My pregnant wife’s going into labor, what should I do?”
He said, “Is this her first child?”
I said, “No, this is her husband.”
Family Matters
“Why doesn’t your mother like me?” a woman asks her boyfriend.
“Don’t take it personally,” he assures her. “She’s never liked anyone I’ve dated. I once dated someone exactly like her, and that didn’t work out at all.”
“What happened… Read More
Still a Kid
I was really embarrassed when my wife caught me playing with my son’s train set by myself. In a moment of panic, I threw a bedsheet over it.
I think I managed to cover my tracks.
The Easy Way Up
My wife always prefers the stairs, whereas I always like to take the elevator.
I guess we are raised differently.