Portable Primping
People always ask me how long it takes to do my hair. I don’t know. I’m never there.
Dolly Parton
More Jokes
For Every Set of Horseshoes…
For every set of horseshoes human beings use for luck, somewhere in this world there’s a barefoot horse.
—Allan Sherman
Check your math
If I got 50 cents for every failed math exam, I’d have $ 6.30 now.
It Came Back to Haunt Him
Some sad news from Australia … the inventor of the boomerang grenade died today.
—Johnny Carson
Time Zones Are Hard.
While I was out to lunch, my coworker answered my phone and told the caller that I would be back in 20 minutes. The woman asked, “Is that 20 minutes Central Standard Time?”
Jamie Hindman, Lewisville, Texas
When I was a child…
When I was a child my father attacked me with cameras; I still have flashbacks.
—Stewart Francis
Remember Me
I don’t want to achieve immortality through my work…I want to achieve it through not dying.—Woody Allen
A Method to His Mitchness
The late comedian Mitch Hedberg said that he would write jokes by sitting around his hotel room thinking of things that cracked him up. “Then I go get a pen, and I write it down,” he said. “Or, if the pen’s too far away, I … Read More
