Meanwhile, in a parallel universe: “Oh for God’s sake! Where are all these extra single socks coming from?!”
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Laugh more, live longer with the funniest jokes ever.
Hell hath no fury like a woman who has accidentally napped.
Equations are the devil’s sentences.
Every Scooby-Doo episode would literally be two minutes long if the gang went to the mask store first and asked a few questions.
When the comments
turn from “Hey! I really like your beard!” into “Hey! …
Please stop calling us your “squad,” Linda; this is book club.
1. Nice shirt.
2. Wow. A second nice shirt.
3. OK, first shirt again.
4. He has two shirts.
Overheard in a ladies’ fitting room: “Honestly, do these pants make my rear end look big?”
“Honestly? Your rear end makes the pants look big.”