I was going to make myself a belt made out of watches, but then I realized it would be a waist of time.
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Q: Why do French people eat snails?
A: Because they won’t touch fast food.
Last week I called someone a watering hole but I meant well.
What did the beach say as the tide came in?
Long time, no sea.
RIP boiling water. You will be mist.
I had to clean out my spice rack and found everything was too old and had to be thrown out. What a waste of thyme.
What does C.S. Lewis keep at the back of his wardrobe? Narnia business!
Q. What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?
A. A hippo is really heavy, and a Zippo is a little lighter.
What do you call a laughing motorcycle? A Yamahahaha.