15 Cringe-Worthy Stories About the Worst Roommates Ever
And you thought it was bad when your roommates forgot to clean their dishes.
“My freshman year of college I walked into my dorm where my roommate’s stuff was. There had to be about 100 stuffed llamas spread throughout my room. On her bed, desk, floor, hanging from the wall. Then she walked in and handed me one of her stuffed llamas and said, “This is Carl. Carl loves you.” I immediately filed for a new roommate and ended up getting a new one who moved in and was super into anime and filled the walls with anime posters and action figures. From that moment on, I decided I will never have a roommate again.” —CU from Connecticut
“I always liked to take naps and when I would wake up, my roommate would be staring down at me while doing splits next to my bed.” —Anonymous from New York City, as told to room rental app Roomi. Don’t miss these 15 hilarious real things people have said in their sleep.
“Freshman year of college I came back to my room to find a guitar smashed on the ground and all my lotions, hair products, and toiletries all over the walls and floor, open and broken. Next thing I know, the campus police walk up behind me and ask, ‘What happened here?’ My roommate was missing, but I found out later that her jealous boyfriend had snapped and broken her guitar and started throwing all my stuff from my dresser at her.” —Amber from Pennsylvania
A bit batty
“My roommate’s contribution to our room décor was a giant bat Halloween decoration (for all season use). It was made of garbage bag plastic and had a big face on it, with a wingspan of at least four feet. She hung it in the corner of our dorm room right at the foot of my bed, so I got to wake up to it every morning.” —J.G. from Milwaukee, Wisconsin.
“Once a friend and I decided to move into a house with three strangers who were all friends. We met them on social media and then met each other for the first time to view the apartment. They seemed nice, so we signed the lease, but it quickly became a nightmare! One of the roommates claimed the living room as her bedroom and one refused to pay their portion of the utility bills. The final straw was when one of my roommates stole my bike and sold it on Facebook!” —Carli Evilsizer, marketing director for Roomi
“Our air conditioner didn’t work, so my roommate’s solution was to always keep the front door open and unlocked (we couldn’t find his keys after he got them replaced for the nth time). This was on the first floor of the dorms, in Orlando, right next to campus.” —Ryan from New York
“Freshman year I was in a triple, and when you’re in a triple there’s always one weird roommate. My roommate’s mom bought us a huge box of granola bars from Costco, the boxes that come with like 75 bars. Over the course of the week, my one roommate (the one whose mom bought the box) and I had eaten about five granola bars but by Friday the box was empty. That means our third roommate ate the rest of them. That’s 70 granola bars in one week! We started hiding our food after that.” —Morgan from Connecticut
“My first post-college roommate was my best friend, and a few months before our year lease was up, some long-simmering resentment about cleaning the bathroom (or something) boiled over into a big fight, so we stopped talking, labeled all our food so the other wouldn’t take it, and lived together WITHOUT SPEAKING for the rest of the time we shared the house. Happily, we made up about a year later and we are friends to this day.” —Sarah from Connecticut
“Once I rushed into living with someone, without really knowing them or having any way to verify their background, and was robbed of my all belongings and security deposit. I knew there had to be a better way to search for a room to rent.” —Ajay Yadav, founder of Roomi.
“I had one roommate that never cleaned his room, which was equally terrible and amazing when we had to find his wallet or keys because he spared nothing on his floor. I didn’t know one person could have that many things stuffed into one room. We spent two hours looking for his wallet and only found it in the fridge because we were hungry.” —Ryan from New York
“In my early New York City years, I had a roommate who didn’t have a job and sat in the middle of the love seat all day watching TV. She literally made a dent in the cushions! This infuriated me. We couldn’t afford new furniture! My other roommate and I called her Jobless Jane.” —Lynn from New York. Don’t miss these 34 hilarious excuses people have actually used to get out of work.
Caught with her pants down
“One of my college roommates hated wearing pants, so she’d strip every time she came back to our dorm room (a triple). She did this even when my boyfriend came to visit. I had to ask her to please wear pants when he was around.” —JR from Iowa City. Check out these items that make dorm living so much better.
If you want it done right …
“Right when we moved in my roommate convinced me that he didn’t know how to use the dishwasher in what now seems like a really clever way (when I asked him to put his dishes in the washer when he used them, he put one in horizontally). So I never asked him again and always was the one to load it.” —Jeremy from New York
“I had a roommate in college who was a professional video gamer and would stay up all night playing video games and talking into her headset coaching her team. And do this all day. I don’t know if she actually went to class. It was weird.” —Alex from New York
“Sophomore year was a trip. I lived with one guy who I still consider a best friend and two others who I never want to see again. One with whom I shared my room, would talk to himself, hit himself, yell at himself, and for some reason needed a full roll of toilet paper every time he went to the bathroom. The other guy thought he was gangster. He would threaten to stab me, try to blackmail me, and would cover the kitchen table in crack. In the school’s words, ‘We can’t do anything unless he actually stabs you.’ So I miraculously found another dorm.” —Ethan A., as told to Roomi. For some lighter stories, check out these 14 hilarious 911 calls from real people.