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Comedians Share Their Most Useful (and Hilarious) Advice for Dads

IKEA furniture comes with more instructions than that crying infant you’ve brought home from the hospital or the grumpy teenager who won't talk to you. Here, parenting advice all petrified fathers should keep in mind.

Reader's Digest

Where your wife gives birth matters

Your wife may not want the birth to become a spectator sport, anyway. If you think that’s funny advice, check out this life advice from the wittiest people who ever lived.

Reader's Digest

Prepare yourself: There’s nothing pretty about the birthing process

No one said childbirth is all rainbows and sunshine. Thanks for the mental image, Jeff.

Reader's Digest

There’s only one thing you need to know about diapers

Everything else concerning diapers is secondary. Speaking of diapers, try these natural diaper rash remedies on your little one.

Reader's Digest

If you’re going to have one kid, might as well have a bunch

Sounds like one of those sage mantras from the olden days. Of course, things have changed since then. Old etiquette books had some ridiculous tips that people actually followed. Now it’s just funny advice that no one follows.

Reader's Digest

Set aside alone time for you and your precious little snowflakes

Timing is everything when it comes to parenting—and apparently when it comes to funny advice, too.

Reader's Digest

Gush over every gift your child bestows upon you

Don’t give your dad the same tie in a new color every year. These are Father’s Day gifts that every dad will actually love.

Reader's Digest

Learn from other parents

That’s one way to handle it, we suppose.

Reader's Digest

Keep in mind: Playtime is together-time

Dads who do this in real life are comedic geniuses, and we should be taking funny advice from them. Instead, here’s the advice that intellectual geniuses give their kids.

Reader's Digest

Devise a plan to deal with your grumpy teen

You may reconsider that plan once you find out all the secrets your dog knows about you.

Reader's Digest

Always have your wits about you

Just like that cup of coffee. And your keys. And your wallet. And your sanity.

Reader's Digest

Stock up on energy bars

Except the mess from the blender is easier to clean up.

Reader's Digest

Expect the unexpected

Want to know another fascinating fact about twins? You’re more likely to conceive them now than you were 30 years ago. Congrats in advance!

Reader's Digest

Beware what you say around the house

They’ll say it twice as often if you tell them to never say it again.

Reader's Digest

Your home is not a restaurant

Or you can pop in a frozen dinner that you can serve guilt-free.

Reader's Digest

And never be ashamed to believe that your child is perfection personified

Yes, comedians go through the same parenting struggles as the rest of us. Just look at these hilarious parenting tweets that are so spot-on, it’s scary.

Originally Published in Reader's Digest

Andy Simmons
Andy Simmons is a features editor at Reader's Digest.