Grocery shopping is something we all have to do, seemingly all at the same time. Here's how to make the experience better for everyone, starting with following the rules of grocery store line etiquette.
13 Rude Things You Should Never Do at the Grocery Store
Updated Oct. 05, 2024
Leave your cart in the parking lot
This bad habit infuriates people so much that it has inspired an entire philosophy of human nature: the Shopping Cart Theory. Basically, it says that putting your shopping cart away properly is so simple that it becomes a litmus test of a person’s true self. Good people will return the cart regardless of whether or not anyone is watching. Bad people (or at least less-good people) will abandon their carts, especially if no one is looking.
But leaving your cart in the parking lot is not only lazy—it’s also annoying for anyone trying to pull into a parking spot or pick up a curbside haul ordered through a grocery store app. Plus, it can be downright dangerous, since a driver may not see a worker collecting a rogue shopping cart when pulling into a space. And yes, leaving it on the curb is also a problem, according to grocery store employees, who say this is still not polite.
Do this instead: Put your cart in the cart corral, or return it to the cart lobby at the front of the store. “This is such a simple kindness—it takes, what, maybe one minute?—that there’s no excuse not to do it,” Goss says.
Step out of the checkout line to grab another item
OK, back to my favorite topic: grocery store line etiquette. Let’s say you’re in line, waiting to check out, when you suddenly remember that you forgot the onion you absolutely need to make the chili you planned for dinner. You can see the onion from where you’re standing. Surely you can just run over and grab one and be back before the line moves, right? Hey, we’ve all been there. But while this might be one of the more sympathetic bad habits, it doesn’t make it OK to do, Swann says. Chances are, the line will move while you’re gone, forcing other shoppers to move your cart for you. And heaven forbid that your cart makes it to the cashier without you. “What you see as a little thing can turn into a big inconvenience to others,” she explains.
Do this instead: Pull your cart out of line, and then leave to get your forgotten onion. You can rejoin the line, at the end, when you return. “Is this inconvenient? Yes,” says Goss. “But the difference is that you’re choosing to inconvenience yourself rather than others, which is right since it’s your mistake.”
Cut the line
Not as nuanced as the grocery store line etiquette issue above, this is always an etiquette mistake. The easiest way to offend literally anyone at the grocery store is to cut the line—whether it’s at the checkout, pharmacy or deli. “People get upset because it feels very unfair: Your time is not more valuable than theirs,” Goss says. “And while the world isn’t always fair, etiquette rules exist to make it feel a bit more equitable.” This is true even if you ask first. Sometimes people with just a few items will ask to cut in front of someone with a full cart, but even if they are fine with it, everyone else behind them may not be.
Do this instead: Wait your turn. “Learning to wait patiently in line is a life skill,” Goss says. This can be a little trickier at the deli, bakery, pharmacy or other department where people wait but not necessarily in an organized line. “Note who is there before you, and let them go first,” she suggests. “It’s not about which person can get closest to the counter.”
Block the aisle with your cart
Oops, the applesauce you needed is at the end of aisle 5, and you’re already in aisle 6! You’ll just leave your cart in this aisle while you grab a jar—no big deal. Actually, it kind of is a big deal, Goss says. It’s no grocery store shopping secret that most people will find it very rude if your cart gets in the way of their own trip down an aisle. Obviously, it’s harder to keep your cart out of other people’s way in a store with narrow aisles or on a particularly busy shopping day, but you should do your best to avoid causing cart traffic jams … and you should definitely not leave your cart unattended.
Do this instead: “Move your cart along with you, as you go up and down aisles,” Swann says. If the aisles are too crowded or you really need to leave your cart for a minute, pull it out of the aisle and off to the side, where it’s not blocking anyone’s way.
Stand too close to someone else
Picture this scenario: You’re waiting to check out, your cart is full and you’re dreading the unloading and reloading that awaits you, when someone suddenly scooches up right behind you. Maybe they’re looking at the gum. Maybe they just want to unload the gallon of milk in their hands early. Maybe they are trying to pick your pocket or do something else nefarious. Did your hackles go up? If you’re like most people, this would really bother you. Regardless of intent, Goss says, “one of the top etiquette rules of being in public is to respect other people’s physical space.”
Do this instead: Keep a few feet of distance between you and others, whether you’re in a checkout line or an aisle. And don’t put your food on the belt early; wait until your cart reaches the belt, and then use a divider before placing your food on it.
Game the express lane
If the express lane says “10 items or less,” it’s bad form to get in line with 11 items or more, Swann says. You should also count your items accurately—for instance, if you have six boxes of mac-and-cheese, that counts as six items, not one. And if you’re going to try to game the express lane, please don’t pretend you don’t know what you’re doing. Everyone knows what you’re doing. Try looking for the fastest grocery store line to go through instead of clogging up the express lane.
Do this instead: Follow the posted rules for using the express checkout lane. In addition, don’t police other people’s behavior. Just because someone else is trying to take 30 items through an express lane doesn’t mean that you can or should call out their bad behavior.
Let your kids misbehave
Fact: Grocery stores are open to the public, and children and babies are members of the public. Not only are children allowed to be there, but they should be there—learning how to grocery-shop is an important life skill, and that is how kids learn it. Plus, no one’s hiring a babysitter just to run to the grocery store. Parents deserve a bit of grace, but this doesn’t mean you should let your children do whatever they want, Goss says. Sometimes a tantrum is unavoidable, but you can and should stop your kids from running rampant through the store, climbing on things, speaking too loudly, messing with other people’s carts, opening packages and essentially being a menace.
Do this instead: Goss, who is a mother and foster mom of 50 children, says the key is “to practice etiquette with children before you go to the store so they know what to expect. Play ‘grocery store’ at home, and talk about what good behavior looks like.” Once at the store, keep young children within arm’s reach at all times (it’s for their safety as well), and correct misbehavior immediately. Also be prepared to take a child out of the store if they can’t behave.
Neglect to put back items where they belong
You came to the store for a carton of milk only to discover all the checkout lanes are packed. What do you do? Return the milk to the refrigerated case where you got it … all the way on the other side of the store? Yes! Because if you leave it anywhere else, you’re being rude, not to mention incredibly wasteful. Many stores have a policy of throwing out perishable foods found around the store, since they don’t know how long it’s been out of the fridge or freezer and they don’t want to risk selling unsafe food.
Also note that this grocery store etiquette rule doesn’t apply just to perishable items. It’s rude to purposely misplace any item, Swann says, because it creates more work for already overworked service workers.
Do this instead: Put the item back where you got it. If that’s not an option, you can hand it directly to a store employee, who can put it back in the right spot. Just be sure to be extra grateful and say thank you for their help, Swann says.
Eat food you haven’t purchased
This has always been a bit of a gray area: Can you drink the soda or eat the nuts you’re already planning on buying? You’ll be paying for it anyhow, and who doesn’t like a little snack as you stroll through the store? Grocery store employees probably won’t call you out on it, but this is technically stealing, as you haven’t paid for it yet, Swann says. That includes “sampling” things like grapes and strawberries or “tasting” deli items offered at a salad bar.
Do this instead: Don’t sample any food that isn’t explicitly set out as a sample. If you need a snack, hop in the self-checkout line and pay for it before you eat it (and keep the receipt on you). Under no circumstances should you ever eat an item entirely then leave the empty package on a shelf for workers to clean up. The store is not a buffet, and that is actual stealing.
Reach over people to grab something
A fellow shopper is taking forever to decide what cereal they want to buy, and you know exactly what you want. The only problem is that they’re blocking the granola you need. “Resist the temptation to reach over or around someone to grab something, even if you are just going to be quick,” Swann says. “You may startle or scare them, and it’s rude to invade their space.”
Do this instead: Ask politely. “Say ‘excuse me,’ and then state what you need and what you’d like to do,” Swann says. This can be asking to scoot in and grab the item or have them hand you the item. “Most of the time, the other person will move out of your way.”
Not pay attention at the self-checkout
Self-checkout machines were supposed to make our lives easier, making it super efficient to pay for your groceries, especially if you have only a few things. In reality, the machines often malfunction and there’s a lot of user error—both of which can make for a long wait for the people behind you. “A lot of that could be avoided if people paid attention to the instructions on the screen and the order it tells you to do things,” Swann says. A big problem is being distracted by your phone while you’re trying to check out or trying to move too quickly for the machine.
Do this instead: Put your phone in your pocket, and pay attention to the on-screen prompts. If you get stuck, press the call for help button right away. “I also like to explain to the person behind me what’s going on so they don’t wonder what the holdup is,” Swann says. “Something like, ‘Hey, I’m waiting for someone to come help me, and it may be a minute. You may want to get in a different line.’”
Take a call on speakerphone
Talking on speakerphone is a rude behavior in any public location, but there’s something about the grocery store that makes people want to do it more often than in other places, Goss notes. Perhaps you’re asking your spouse what type of sauce they want or catching up with your sister while you shop—it is a pain (literally and figuratively) to try to hold your phone up to your ear while you maneuver a cart. But that’s not an excuse to use phone speakers in the store. “Not to mention that people distracted by a loud phone call are more likely to engage in other rude behaviors, like reaching around someone or leaving their cart in the middle of the aisle,” Goss adds.
Do this instead: If you need to take a call, take it quickly and quietly, and don’t use the speakerphone. If you need to use the speaker, step outside.
Talk on your phone during checkout
This is another very common phone etiquette mistake, and it has the added issue of not just being annoying to other shoppers but also rude to the person trying to serve you. “It’s not OK to ignore the person in front of you, the cashier, when they are trying to help you,” Goss says. This can make them feel bad, but it can also take them longer to check you out if they need to ask you a question and can’t get your attention. Incidentally, this is also true when you’re at the nail salon or any other service appointment.
Do this instead: “Give your attention to the person physically in front of you,” Goss says. “Exchange a few pleasantries.” To do that properly, you’ll need to hang up before reaching the belt. Put your phone in your purse or pocket during the checkout process.
Additional reporting by Lauren Cahn.
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Reader’s Digest has published hundreds of etiquette stories that help readers navigate communication in a changing world. We regularly cover topics such as the best messages to send for any occasion, polite habits that aren’t as polite as they seem, email and texting etiquette, business etiquette, tipping etiquette, travel etiquette and more. We’re committed to producing high-quality content by writers with expertise and experience in their field in consultation with relevant, qualified experts. We rely on reputable primary sources, including government and professional organizations and academic institutions as well as our writers’ personal experience where appropriate. For this piece on grocery store line etiquette and other supermarket manners, Charlotte Hilton Andersen tapped her experience as a longtime journalist who specializes in etiquette and communication for Reader’s Digest. We verify all facts and data, back them with credible sourcing and revisit them over time to ensure they remain accurate and up to date. Read more about our team, our contributors and our editorial policies.
Sources:
- Elaine Swann, certified etiquette expert, founder of the Swann School of Protocol and author of Let Crazy Be Crazy; phone interview, Sept. 6, 2024
- Jan Goss, CEO and founder of Show Up Well Consulting and author of Protocol Power; phone interview, Sept. 4, 2024
Originally Published: March 13, 2024
