Be your own Valentine
Valentine’s Day has long been known as the romantic holiday for couples but it’s changed in recent years to be more encompassing, to celebrate all different kinds of love. And it’s a good thing! One in three American adults are single, with half saying they’re looking for love and the other half saying they’re content with their current relationship status, according to the latest Pew Research poll. So even though romantic movies may make it seem like everyone else is going to be loved up for Valentine’s Day, the truth is that if your single on Valentine’s Day, you’re in really good company.
The best part is that you get to celebrate the day exactly how you want to—ordering your favorite foods, watching your favorite movie, or doing whatever helps you love yourself and recognize you for being the awesome person you are.
Note: Prices listed were accurate as of press time; pricing fluctuations may occur.
Write yourself a love letter
$16.00
Love is a basic and powerful human need and while feeling loved by others is wonderful, the foundation of meeting your love needs is learning to love yourself first, says Kristin Orlowski, PhD, licensed clinical psychologist with UCHealth Family Medicine – Littleton, Colorado and President-Elect of the Colorado Psychological Association. And you can forget about the myth that self-love equals selfishness. “Healthy self-love leads to resilience and growth and helps you weather the storms of life,” she says, adding that this is true whether you’re in a relationship, looking for a relationship, or are happily single. “Learning to value yourself is one of the most important things you can do to have more stable, healthy relationships with yourself and others.”
It can be all too easy to focus on our flaws so this Valentine’s Day, make a conscious effort to focus on all the good things you do and are, Orlowski says. Writing yourself a love letter—sharing your strengths, accomplishments, and core values—can be an incredibly powerful and healing experience whether you’re single on Valentine’s Day or not. Be as gushy and loving with yourself as you would be if you were writing it to someone else. Add in a few positive affirmations for good measure. Then go all out and make it extra special with a handmade card decked out with stickers, glitter, and hearts.
For more suggestions for building self-love, try these “How to Love Yourself” affirmation cards.
Take a bubble bath
$26.80
Grab an entertaining book, pour a glass of something delicious, turn on your favorite playlist, and then make yourself the most epic bubble bath ever. Use fizzy bath bombs or scented oils. Light the candles. Drop-in some rose petals. Then: luxuriate.
These beautiful bath bombs from LifeAround2Angles are as moisturizing and soothing as they are fun to use.
Buy yourself something sparkly
$14.97
You know your own ring size, what type of metal doesn’t irritate your ears, and exactly what style of jewelry you like so use Valentine’s Day sales as an opportunity to buy something beautiful for yourself. Make it extra meaningful by tying it to something you love about yourself, like a charm that represents your favorite hobby or a bracelet inscribed with your favorite mantra. Find out how people celebrate Valentine’s Day around the world.
This Joycuff bracelet comes with many inspirational and funny options for messages or you can choose your own inscription.
Paint something
$21.99
If you’re worried about getting lost in your thoughts of the past or worries about the future, try doing something creative. An art project is the perfect antidote for rumination and can increase feelings of peace, satisfaction, accomplishment, and self-love, Orlowski says. Paint with watercolors, decorate a piece of pottery (many stores now offer “to-go kits” to do at home), crochet a potholder, try your hand at quilling or felting. And don’t worry about making it perfect, part of the process is learning to appreciate the art as it takes shape even if it’s not exactly like the picture. (Kind of like yourself!)
“Diamond painting” is a fun new art form appropriate for all levels. Try this beginner kit from Cskunxia with four beautiful scenes.
Play dress up
$39.97
“Life should be enjoyed and embraced, not spent sitting at home feeling alone,” says Dallisa Hocking, CEO of Spirit & Spark. “So, I advise anyone who is single on Valentine’s Day to make it a celebration by turning it into an ‘I Love My Life’ day.” One way to do this is by getting dressed up, donning something that makes you feel special and confident. Do a dramatic makeup look. Wear a tiara. Pull out your best jewelry. For more inspiration, check out these 15 things everyone should do alone at least once.
These nude ankle strap heels from Sam Edelman are beyond flattering and work with everything from your favorite skinny jeans to a LBD.
Try a new hobby
$18.99
Many businesses offer Valentine’s Day discounts on class packages and you don’t have to be in a relationship to do them. Sign up with your bestie or go solo and try something you’ve always wanted to do, like go to an opera, bake a fancy cake, or swim the butterfly. Explore your interests, and let them take you out into the world. Anywhere you go, there are bound to be lots of other people worth meeting and getting to know. If you feel like flirting, fine. If you feel like making a new friend, that’s fine, too. Don’t miss these 29 tips for finding love after 40.
Indulge your inner chef with this beginning cake decorating kit from Dogcrit.
Set up a virtual happy hour with friends
$349.85
Real-life hangouts with friends will depend on the social distancing guidelines where you live but it’s always safe to set up a virtual meet-up. Organize a Valentine’s Day Zoom happy hour where everyone brings their favorite festive drink or mixes a specialty cocktail from a recipe you send out in advance.
Make your own spirits into a high-end lounge quality cocktails with the press of a button on the Bartesian Premium Cocktail machine. This mixology bartender kit comes with everything you need to make bar-worthy drinks at home plus it has recipe cards.
Throw a Valentine’s Day party for your kids
$4.99
Being a single parent doesn’t mean you have to (or should) ignore Valentine’s Day. Make it a special evening with your kiddos. Cook a meal where everything is pink and red or cut into heart shapes. Craft valentines together. Watch a silly movie. Paint your nails. You’ll love the quality time with your kids and be reminded of how much you are really loved—there is nothing as powerful as the unconditional love of a child. If you’ve been feeling down about your single status, you’ll want to know these top 10 benefits of being divorced.
These nesting heart cookie cutters from Wilton offer lots of options for heart-shaped pancakes, cookies, biscuits, or sandwiches.
Have a spa night
$29.99
“Valentine’s Day can be a wonderful day of loving and celebrating yourself,” says Yvonne Thomas, PhD, a psychologist based in Los Angeles. Thomas suggests treating yourself to loving, self-care gifts, such as a massage, mani-pedi, facial, a fresh haircut or blowout, or complimentary makeover. If salons near you are closed, you can still treat yourself at home. Find out how to make your manicure last longer.
Try this Body & Earth spa kit that comes in an adorable reusable storage basket.
Do a social media detox
$13.59
Turning off your phone on Valentine’s Day isn’t hiding, it’s self-care. There’s no need to see pictures of all your friends loved up, fancy gifts, or (heaven forbid) whatever your ex is up to now. Make a commitment to stay off social media for a full 24 hours. One of the most important keys to relishing the single life is to enjoy your own company. Try these 17 little ways to connect with others if you get too lonely.
If you enjoy the peace, read 40-Day Social Media Fast for ideas on how to keep it going.
Break a sweat
$29.95
The natural endorphins you get from exercise are one of the fastest ways to feel instantly happier, making a workout a Valentine’s Day activity. Plus, the heart is more than just a Valentine’s Day symbol. Keeping heart-healthy is an important aspect of self-love and care. Being single on Valentine’s Day makes it a great time to check out a new Pilates video or try an online Zumba class for the first time.
If social distancing regulations allow, you can head to a gym or studio but these may not be safe right now. So set up your own yoga space at home with this Ewedoos cushy yoga mat, complete with alignment lines to help you get into the postures.
“Date” your bestie
$29.95
Who says couples are the only ones who can take advantage of V-Day prix fixe meals, two-for-one movie offers, and discounted couple’s massages? Grab a platonic friend who’s also single on Valentine’s Day and save some moolah with the rest of the date-night crowd. You’ll get the same great deals, minus the pressure of making it the most romantic night possible. No one has to know you aren’t actually a couple.
This “you are my person” necklace from Fairygem is a great way to honor the special relationship you have.
Send a love note
$25.00
This one doesn’t go out to your secret crush. Take time this Valentine’s Day to acknowledge the people you love—and not necessarily in a romantic way. Text a friend you haven’t talked to in a while, make a point of acknowledging a colleague’s hard work, or give your parents a call. Even on date night, we promise they’ll want to hear from you!
Throw in one of these “Love Bomb” kindness pass-along cards to keep spreading the love.
Make a sweet treat
$36.00
Even if no one’s buying you chocolate, you can still indulge in a fancier way than eating ice cream on the couch (not that there’s anything wrong with that). Get to work in the kitchen making homemade chocolate-covered strawberries, cookies, or single-serving lava cake. You’ll get to enjoy the sweetest parts of the holiday while keeping your mind off your singleness. Bring your treats to the office the next day to be everyone’s new favorite coworker, or invite friends over to help bake (and eat!) your creations. You could also treat yourself to one of these 15 gifts to give yourself if you’re single on Valentine’s Day.
Treat yourself with this handy Wilton Candy Melts Pot for melting chocolate or cheese to the perfect temperature for dipping.
Sources:
- Pew Research Center: “A Profile of Single Americans”
- Kristin Orlowski, PhD, licensed clinical psychologist with UCHealth Family Medicine – Littleton, Colorado and President-Elect of the Colorado Psychological Association
- Dallisa Hocking, CEO of Spirit & Spark
- Yvonne Thomas, PhD, a psychologist based in Los Angles