30 Hilarious Made Up Words You’ll Want to Start Using
Just remember, people might not understand you if you start using these.
“When I use a word,” Humpty Dumpty said in rather a scornful tone, “it means just what I choose it to mean—neither more nor less.” —Through the Looking Glass
I agree with Mr. Dumpty: Words have meaning. But surely we can seize upon a meaning and then create a word to match it. The following words—some culled from the crowdsourced online dictionary urbandictionary.com and others I’ve concocted myself—don’t exist according to Merriam-Webster … but should. I call them “worderfuls.” Try using these funny words to improve your vocabulary.
(ah kra-‘peh-luh) adj.—Sung (badly) while listening to music using headphones.
(‘bays-bull) n.—The endless litany of RBIs, ERAs, OPS, WHIP, and hits at the fingertips of every major-league basebore.
(‘beer-bohrd) v.—To extract secret information from colleagues by getting them drunk.
(‘kahr-kuh-lep-see) n.—The tendency to fall asleep as soon as the car starts moving. These are the funniest words in the English language, according to science.
(kah-‘roh-muh) n.—The smell of that month-old bean burrito under the front seat that keeps you out of the carpool.
(‘chair-drohb) n.—A chair on which one piles clothes that belong in the closet. Not to be confused with a floordrobe.
(‘chip-teez) n.—A bag of potato chips that seems full but is mostly air.
(‘dood-vohrs) n.—When two bros end their friendship. These words are so funny that they sound made up.
(duh-‘leh-muh) n.—The choice between two equally boring outcomes.
(‘air-er-ist) n.—Someone who is repeatedly or invariably wrong.
(foh-‘pah-luh-jee) n.—An insincere expression of regret.
(‘in-ter-nest) n.—The cocoon of blankets and pillows you gather around yourself for extended periods on the Internet.
(‘mee-toks) v.—To take a break from self-absorption. Check out these quirky words that don’t have an English translation.
(‘nurd-jak-ing) n.—Filling a conversation with unnecessary detail about one’s passion to an obviously uninterested bystander.
(non-ver-‘say-shuhn) n.—A completely meaningless or useless conversation.
(prih-‘teen-shuhs) adj.—A level of drama achievable only by a 12-year-old.
(‘suh-krih-fys) n.—Doing what you absolutely must do, even though you really, really hate it.
(tekst-pek-‘tay-shuhn) n.—The anticipation felt when awaiting a response to a text.
(uhn-‘ly-ten) v.—To learn something that makes you dumber. Next, read about these words that don’t mean what you think they do.