It's hard to tell what your cat is thinking. These signs will let you know where your relationship with your pet stands.
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He counts on your routines
“Cat trust can be hard to earn, but being consistent will help improve your bond with your cat,” advises Rachel Barrack, DVM, founder of Animal Acupuncture. “Stick to a routine so they know they can depend on you.” Try this trick from Stevens: If your cat gets particularly squirmy when you try to trim his nails, offer him a treat in the kitchen immediately afterward.
Soon, every time you cut his nails, he’ll become more tolerant and head straight for the kitchen when you’re done. Once he’s conditioned to expect this routine, he’ll trust you to come through on your end of the arrangement every time. This same method can be used for meals and grooming cats too.
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She kneads into you
If your cat kneads you, it’s a sign that she needs—and trusts—you. “[Kneading] is a holdover from kittenhood, when your baby kitty would let her mom know she was hungry and ready for milk,” says Daniel Rotman, founder & CEO of PrettyLitter. “When your cat kneads you … she remembers the safe, happy feeling she got while kneading as a baby, and now she wants to share that with you.”
Essentially, your cat could see you as a maternal figure. Unfortunately, sharp claws do make this sign of affection painful for human owners, but don’t let that fool you. “You should feel honored and know that your kitty is head over heels for you!” says Rotman.
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He gives and responds to “cat kisses”
Cats engage in a lot of nonverbal communication, especially with their eyes. According to Anitra Frazier’s book, The Natural Cat: The Comprehensive Guide to Optimum Care, a cat kiss is “a long, slow blink with your gaze and attention fixed on the cat’s eyes before, during and after the blink.” And it’s more than just an eye movement—it’s a way your cat says “I love you!”
If your cat reciprocates, he’s showing you that he trusts and loves you. To send even more affection his way, think “I love you” while you make your cat kiss. Some cats will share a “kiss” even before you do it first, which “indicates that they feel safe and happy in your company,” says Rotman.
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She rubs her face on you
It’s true that, for most animals, a headbutt is anything but a sign of affection. But for cats, it’s actually a loving gesture! You may have seen a cat bump someone with their head—sometimes gently, sometimes not so gently—and then continue to rub against that person. This is how cats mark things with their unique scent.
“When a cat rubs their face on you or headbutts their human’s leg or face, they are actually marking [them] with the scent glands located along the side of their face and top of their head,” says Jodi Ziskin, MS, a certified pet nutrition consultant and spokesperson for Treatibles. “Intermingling scents is a sign of love, acceptance and ownership—cats only ‘own’ people they trust.”
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She rolls onto her back
Your cat’s belly is a particularly tender spot. Stevens says that if she rolls onto her back and exposes her belly, she’s telling you she’s comfortable being around you. This doesn’t necessarily mean your cat wants you to pet her belly, though; most cats don’t actually like that. It’s mainly a sign that she feels protected when you’re nearby, since being on her back is a defenseless position.
“A cat’s stomach is a very vulnerable place,” says Emily Parker, cat behavior expert at Catological. “In the wild, it would be dangerous for a cat to show its belly, since it’s such a soft, tender place for a predator to attack. So if your cat lets you rub her belly (especially if she purrs while you do it!), you can be pretty sure you’re in her good books and she trusts you implicitly.”
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He eats out of your hand (literally)
If a cat is famished—or very spoiled—he might have no problem snarfing food from any old human. And while some ultra-friendly cat breeds are OK with this too, many won’t take food from a human’s hand unless it is someone they trust very much. “Cats are instinctively wary, so they don’t take treats easily from strangers’ hands, unlike many dogs,” says Matthew Goetz, DVM, clinical relations lead for the University of Arizona College of Veterinary Medicine. “If you can feed them snacks or food from your hand, it’s a sure sign they trust you.”
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He brings you spoils
Even if you don’t have a cat, you’ve probably heard about cats bringing their owners little “presents” in the form of dead (or worse, decapitated) backyard critters. While you might view these cat hunting gifts as weird cat behavior, your cat thinks it’s perfectly normal! For them, their prey represents triumph, survival and their instinctual nature as wild hunters.
Wild cats would catch food for their young, so your cat’s “gift” of his latest catch just means he considers you family. “If your cat brings you a dead mouse or bird, think twice before reacting negatively,” says Parker. “Your cat is trying to show you that he trusts you enough to share such a vital part of his survival.”
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She gives you a “thumbs up” with her tail
Cats can send all sorts of different messages with just their tails. In fact, it’s one of the primary facets of feline body language. “A cat’s tail is a good barometer of their mood,” says Rotman. One simple way to know if your cat trusts you is if her tail stands straight up, especially when she sees you or walks toward you.
Some cat experts consider it to be a “thumbs up” in cat lingo. If the tail quivers slightly, it’s even more indication that the cat has positive feelings toward you. “If the tail is quivering a little, that probably means you’re her favorite human and she’s really glad to see you!” Rotman adds.
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Sources:
- Vicki Stevens, director of program management and communications for Companion Animals at Humane World for Animals
- Rachel Barrack, DVM, founder of Animal Acupuncture, holds a doctorate degree of veterinary medicine and is a certified veterinary acupuncturist and certified veterinary Chinese herbalist
- Daniel Rotman, founder and CEO of PrettyLitter, holds a Masters in Public Administration from Harvard University
- Jodi Ziskin, MS, healthy pet coach and certified pet nutrition consultant with a masters degree in holistic nutrition with a concentration in companion animal care
- Emily Parker, cat behavior expert and content manager for Catological
- Matthew Goetz, DVM, clinical relations lead for the University of Arizona College of Veterinary Medicine
- The Natural Cat: The Comprehensive Guide to Optimum Care, Anitra Frazier
Originally Published in Reader's Digest
