Trick or Treat! You Need to Learn These 20 Corny Halloween Jokes

Need to tickle a skeleton’s funny bone? Try one of these.

02-halloween-jokes-lekkyjustdoitiStock/lekkyjustdoit

Q: Why do skeletons have low self-esteem?
A: They have no body to love

 

Q: Know why skeletons are so calm?
A: Because nothing gets under their skin.

(Test out these cheap DIY Halloween decorations that will make this your spookiest holiday ever.)

Q: How do vampires get around on Halloween?
A: On blood vessels

 

Q: What’s a ghoul’s favorite bean?
A: A human bean.

 

Q: Why did the ghost go into the bar?
A: For the Boos.

(If you want more laughs give these punny Halloween costumes a try this year.)

Q: Why did the Vampire read the New York Times?
A: He heard it had great circulation.

Q: Why did the headless horseman go into business?
A: He wanted to get ahead in life.

 

03-halloween-jokes-mediaphotosiStock/mediaphotos

 

Q: Why do girl ghosts go on diets?
A: So they can keep their ghoulish figures.

 

Q: Where does a ghost go on vacation?
A: Mali-boo.

(These skeleton puns will have you on the floor laughing.)

Q: The maker of this product does not want it, the buyer does not use it, and the user does not see it. What is it?
A: A coffin.

 

Q: What do you call a witch’s garage?
A: A broom closet.

 

Q: Why don’t mummies take time off?
A: They’re afraid to unwind.

 

Q: Why did the vampire need mouthwash?
A: Because he had bat breath.

 

01-halloween-jokes-Man_With_No_NameiStock/Man_With_No_Name

 

Q: What is in a ghost’s nose?
A: Boo-gers

(These are the stories behind those spooky Halloween traditions and how they came to haunt us.)

Q: What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?
A: Frostbite

 

Q: How can you tell when a vampire has been in a bakery?
A: All the jelly has been sucked out of the jelly doughnuts.

 

Q: What’s it called when a vampire has trouble with his house?
A: A grave problem.

 

Q: Why can’t the boy ghost have babies?
A: Because he has a Hallo-weenie.

(Try out these free pumpkin carving stencils to bring your jack-o’-lantern to the next level.)

Q: Why do demons and ghouls hang out together?
A: Because demons are a ghouls best friend!

 

Q:What’s it like to be kissed by a vampire?
A: It’s a pain in the neck.

Become more interesting every week!

how we use your e-mail
We will use your email address to send you this newsletter. For more information please read our privacy policy.