Autocorrect can go straight to he’ll. —Constance Normandeau
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Text Jokes
LOL with these funny text jokes.
If you thought your texts were funny, take a look at these text jokes and funny text messages!
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All’s We’ll that Ends We’ll
We'll we'll we'll...if it isn't autocorrect.
We'll we'll we'll...if it isn't autocorrect.
Wrong number
Person 1: Hey Rachyl, do you remember me?
Person 2: Wrong number.
Person 1: What’s your number then?
Person 1: Hey Rachyl, do you remember me?
Person 2: Wrong number.
Person 1: What’s your number then?
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Texting your doctor
Matt: Hey Dr. Park, this is Matt from the Vascular lab. I have an outpatient here with an external iliac occlusion with cold foot pin and numbness that started 3 days ago. What should I do with her?
Hannah: Hi, this is Hannah. I think you have the wrong number, but I Googled it and I’m pretty sure u need to put a stent in her left radial artery. Best of luck, Matt!
Matt: Sorry, wrong number Hannah. She ended up actually getting a stent. Took about 3 hours longer for trained medical professionals to figure out what took you 3 minutes.
Hannah: Yoooo, yall hiring?
Matt: Hey Dr. Park, this is Matt from the Vascular lab. I have an outpatient here with an external iliac occlusion with cold foot pin and numbness that started 3...
Wrong number
Guy: I’m sorry. I hate when we fight cuz I really like you too and wanna be with you too and everytime we fight I feel like I’m gonna make u lose all the feelings u have for me and I don’t want that cuz I like when you like me back.
Girl: I love you too … But who are you?
Guy: I’m sorry. I hate when we fight cuz I really like you too and wanna be with you too and everytime we fight I feel like I’m gonna make...
Texts from Mom
Mom: How make chicken
Daughter: What?
Mom: Where buy chicken
Daughter: Mom, this isn’t Google.
Mom: Avocado
Mom: How make chicken
Daughter: What?
Mom: Where buy chicken
Daughter: Mom, this isn’t Google.
Mom: Avocado
Never text Dad for help
Daughter: Dad there’s a moth on the outside of the bathroom door. Can you get rid of it?
Daughter: Please hurry because I’m going to cry.
Daughter: Dad…
Daughter: Dad…
Dad: Dad is dead. You’re next. Love, Moth
Daughter: Dad there’s a moth on the outside of the bathroom door. Can you get rid of it? Daughter: Please hurry because I’m going to cry. Daughter: Dad… Daughter: Dad…...
Drive safe
I saw a driver texting and driving.
It made me so mad I threw my beer at him.
I saw a driver texting and driving.
It made me so mad I threw my beer at him.
Not again, autocorrect!
Autocorrect has become my worst enema.
Autocorrect has become my worst enema.
Bad odds
Thanks to autocorrect, 1 in 5 children will be getting a visit from Satan this Christmas.
Thanks to autocorrect, 1 in 5 children will be getting a visit from Satan this Christmas.
Fishy text
"I feel like carp today"
"Yeah, you look a little fishy"
"I feel like carp today"
"Yeah, you look a little fishy"
Hungary text
"I am hungary."
"Maybe you should czech the fridge."
"I'm russian to the kitchen."
"Is there any turkey?"
"We have some, but it's covered in greece"
"ew, there's norway I'd eat that!"
“I am hungary.” “Maybe you should czech the fridge.” “I’m russian to the kitchen.” “Is there any turkey?” “We have some, but it’s covered in greece” “ew, there’s norway I’d...
Talk is (not) cheap
Anyone who thinks "talk is cheap"...
obviously didn't pay my daughter's last mobile phone bill!
Anyone who thinks "talk is cheap"...
obviously didn't pay my daughter's last mobile phone bill!
Still can’t read minds
The guy who invented predictive text died last night.
His funfair is next monkey.
The guy who invented predictive text died last night.
His funfair is next monkey.
Check before you send
The guy who invented auto-correct for smart phones passed away today.
Restaurant in peace.
The guy who invented auto-correct for smart phones passed away today.
Restaurant in peace.
No kidding
Q: What do you call an iPhone that isn't kidding around?
A: Dead Siri-ous
Q: What do you call an iPhone that isn't kidding around?
A: Dead Siri-ous
Getting into contact
Q: Why was the cell phone wearing glasses?
A: It lost its contacts.
Q: Why was the cell phone wearing glasses?
A: It lost its contacts.
Listen Up, People
You know you're texting too much when...
You type ppl instead of people in a letter.
You know you're texting too much when...
You type ppl instead of people in a letter.
Old School
You know you're texting too much when...
...you try to text, but you're on a landline.
You know you're texting too much when...
...you try to text, but you're on a landline.
Somebody Stop Me
You know you're texting too much when...
...you're happy when you get stopped at a red light.
You know you're texting too much when...
...you're happy when you get stopped at a red light.
LOL in RL
You know you're texting too much when...
...you say LOL in real life, instead of just laughing.
You know you're texting too much when...
...you say LOL in real life, instead of just laughing.
MSW?! (Mom say what?!)
Texting acronyms can stump even the best parents:
Mom: Your great-aunt just passed away. LOL.
Son: Why is that funny?
Mom: It’s not funny, David! What do you mean?
Son: Mom, LOL means Laughing Out Loud.
Mom: I thought it meant Lots of Love. I have to call everyone back.
~
Daughter: I got an A in Chemistry.
Mom: WTF!
Daughter: Mom, what do you think WTF means?
Mom: Well That’s Fantastic.
~
Mom: What do IDK, LY & TTYL mean?
Son: I don’t know, love you, talk to you later.
Mom: OK, I will ask your sister.
Source: lifebuzz.com
Texting acronyms can stump even the best parents: Mom: Your great-aunt just passed away. LOL. Son: Why is that funny? Mom: It’s not funny, David! What do you mean? Son:...