A man walks into a bar. “Ouch.”
The magic of anti-jokes is that you’re expecting a clever or punny punch line, but instead, the punch line is as anti-climactic and literal as possible. As eye-roll-inducing as they can be, these jokes take the very idea of what a joke is and turn it right on its head. Here are some of our favorite anti-jokes that are funny by accident. Plus, check out some more groan-worthy bad jokes that you can’t help but laugh at.
What did one Frenchman say to the other?
I have no idea; I don’t speak French. But if you’re an English nerd, you’ll love these grammar jokes.
Two muffins are sitting in the oven.
One says, “Wow, it’s hot in here.” The other one says, “Sure is. Probably about 350 degrees Fahrenheit.” Were you expecting another punch line from this anti-joke? Well, we’ve got that joke, too.
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
To.
To who?
No, “to whom.”
Loving these anti-jokes? Here are some more knock knock jokes everyone will appreciate.
A horse walks into a bar.
Several of the patrons quickly get up and leave, realizing the potential danger in the situation. Love animals? You won’t stop laughing at these animal memes.
Why is 6 afraid of 7?
It’s not. Numbers aren’t sentient and are therefore incapable of feeling fear. Learn the secrets to telling a great joke, straight from stand-up comedians.
Want to hear something that’ll make you smile?
Your face muscles. Check out some of our favorite science jokes.
What did Buzz Lightyear say to Woody?
A lot. There were three movies, and a couple short films too. For more laughs, don’t miss these bad puns.
A priest, a rabbi, and a monk walk into a bar.
They all get a drink, because bars in America are legally required to serve people of all religions. Check out some more of our favorite “walks into a bar” jokes.
What’s a vampire’s favorite food?
Vampires aren’t real. But these Halloween jokes will give you real laughs!
What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
Stolen. Stealing is bad and you should return it. Here are some of our favorite food jokes.
What do you call a cross between…
…a joke and a rhetorical question? —Reddit user Jesus_The_Super_Jew. These clever jokes will instantly make you sound smart.
What’s black and white and red all over?
Due to the expansive nature of the universe, many items both natural and manufactured could be described in this manner. Move over, anti-jokes. If you laugh at these dark jokes, you might just be a genius!
What’s a pirate’s favorite letter of the alphabet?
None. Historians believe that most pirates were most likely illiterate. —@AntiJokeCat. If you want more funny pirate jokes, here they arrrrr.
Two chemists walk into a bar. The first says “I’ll take a glass of H2O.” The second says “I’ll take a glass of H2O too.”
Since the bartender is not a chemist, he has no idea that H2O2 is the chemical formula for hydrogen peroxide, and gives both chemists a glass of water. Expecting that one to end a little differently, too? If you’re unfamiliar, this is the (rather dark) way that joke usually ends, plus more chemistry jokes.
Helium walks into a bar.
He orders a drink and wonders why his parents decided to give him such an unusual name, as he can never find it on personalized souvenirs. Plus, baristas never, ever get it right. Check out these physics jokes that’ll make you wish you paid more attention in science class.
Roses are red, violets are blue…
…but roses can also be many other colors, including yellow, pink, and white; and violets actually look more purple than blue, hence their name. Next, check out these 75 hilarious short jokes anybody can remember.