Math Puns

Q: What is the hardest shape to get out of?
A: Tell me.
Q: The trap-azoid.

Q: How do you stay warm in an empty room?

A: Go stand in the corner—it’s always 90 degrees.

Did you hear about the statistician who drowned crossing a river?

It was three feet deep, on average.

Q: Why should the number 288 never be mentioned?

A: Because it’s two gross.

Q: Are monsters good at math?

A: No, unless you Count Dracula.

I just saw my math teacher lock himself in his office with a piece of graph paper.

I think he must be plotting something.

Infinitely many mathematicians walk into a bar. The first says, “Give me a beer.”

The second says, “I’ll have a half a beer.”

The third says, “A quarter of a beer, please.”

The bartender pours two beers and says, “Come on, people. Know your limits.”

Q: Why do teenagers always travel in groups of 3, 5, or 7?

A: Because they can’t even.

Parallel lines have so much in common.

It’s a shame they’ll never meet.

I don’t get the point of decimals.

I’m more partial to fractions.

Q: Why should you wear glasses during math class?

A: They say it improves division.

When algebra teachers retire, how do they cope with the aftermath?

Old mathematicians never die.

They just disintegrate

I knew a mathematician who couldn’t afford lunch.

He could binomial.

Q: What did the mermaid wear to math class?

A: An algae-bra.