Q. How do vampires start their letters? A. “Tomb it may concern…”
Q. What’s a writing utensil’s favorite place to go on vacation? A. Pencil-vania!
Q. How does the Man in the Moon cut his hair? A. Eclipse it!
Q. Where do polar bears keep their money? A. In a snow bank!
Q. Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A. Because chickens didn’t exist yet!
Q. Why was the broom late for school? A. It overswept!
Q. What do you call a duck that loves making jokes? A. A wise-quacker!
Q. What did the finger say to the thumb? A. I’m in glove with you!
Q. What did one pickle say to the other pickle who wouldn’t stop complaining? A. “Dill with it.”
Q. What’s really fast, loud, and tastes good with salsa? A. A rocket chip!
Q. What has hundreds of ears but can’t hear a thing? A. A cornfield!
Q: Why didn’t the zombie go to school? A: He felt rotten!
Q: Which fruit is a vampire’s favorite? A: Neck-tarine!
Q: How do you fix a damaged jack-o-lantern? A: You use a pumpkin patch!
Q: What do Italian ghosts have for dinner? A: Spook-hetti!
Q: What dog breed would Dracula love to have as a pet? A: Blood hound!
Q: Why is a cemetery a great place to write a story? A: Because there are so many plots there!
Q: What do female ghosts use to do their makeup? A: Vanishing Cream!
Q: What do witches ask for at hotels? A: Broom service!
Q: What did the mummy ghost say to the noisy young ghost who kept interrupting? A: “Spook when you’re spooken to.”
Q: What do ghosts wear when their eyesight gets blurred? A: Spooktacles
Q: What would be the national holiday for a nation of vampires? A: Fangs-giving!
Q: What is a skeleton’s favorite musical instrument? A: A Trombone!
Q: What genre of music does a mummy like the best? A: Wrap!
Q: What does a ghost call his mom and dad? A: His transparents.
Q: How do you get inside a locked cemetery at night? A: Use a Skeleton Key to unlock the gates!
Q: What is the name of the witch who lives in the desert? A: Sand-witch!
Q: What does a panda ghost eat? A: Bam-BOO!
Q: What is a recess at a mortuary called? A: A Coffin Break!
Q: Where do ghosts like to travel on vacation? A: The Dead Sea!
Q: What do ghosts use to wash their hair? A: Sham-BOO!
Q: What do you call a witch who lives on a beach? A: A sand-witch
Q: What do birds say on Halloween to get candy? A: Twick-or-tweet
Q. What do you call a droid that likes taking the scenic route? A. R2-Detour!
Q: Why did the skeleton climb up the tree? A: Because a dog was after his bones!
Q: How did the skeleton know it was going to rain on Halloween? A: He could feel it in his bones!
Q: Why are all of Superman’s costumes tight? A: They’re all size S.
Q. Who helps little pumpkins cross the road on the way to school? A. The Crossing Gourd!
Q. Why did Mickey Mouse become an astronaut? A. So he could visit Pluto!
Q: Why shouldn’t you give Elsa a balloon? A. Because she’ll let it go!