Q. Why shouldn’t you fall in love with a pastry chef? A. He’ll dessert you.
#GeekPickupLines: My name’s Microsoft … can I crash at your place tonight? @tillinghast (Mark Dryzcimski) #RobotPickupLines: “You had me at 100100010000101100110010011001001111.” @pound_hashtag #ThatAwkwardMoment: When someone says “Hello!” and you say “Good, thanks!” @menshumor #MySexLifeinMovieTitles: Home Alone @iowahawkblog (David Burge)
• The ad for the 14k white gold engagement ring in “like-new condition” included a caveat: It was worn “by Satan herself.” The ad then warned, “Ring may be cursed, as it tends to leave a path of destruction behind it. Possible events associated with this ring include but are not limited to: damage sustained […]
Every Valentine’s Day our campus newspaper has a section for student messages. Last year my roommate surprised his girlfriend with roses and dinner at a fancy restaurant. When they returned from their date, she leafed through the paper to see if he had written a note to her. Near the bottom of one page she […]
My high-school English teacher was well known for being a fair, but hard, grader. One day I received a B minus on a theme paper. In hopes of bettering my grade and in the spirit of the valentine season, I sent her an extravagant heart-shaped box of chocolates with the pre-printed inscription: “BE MINE.” The […]
As Valentine’s Day approached, I tried to think of an unusual gift for my husband. When I discovered that his favorite red-plaid pants had a broken zipper, I thought I had the “perfect Valentine.” I had the pants repaired, and gift-wrapped them. On the package I put a huge red heart on which I printed: […]