I’m writing my book in fifth person, so
every sentence starts out with: “I heard from this guy who told somebody ...”
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Q: Why did the poor man sell yeast?
A: To raise some dough.
I recently decided to sell my vacuum cleaner as all it was doing was gathering dust.
Anyone who’s just driven 90 yards against huge men trying to kill them has earned the right to do jazz hands.
An old farmer is inconsolable after his dog goes missing. He takes out an ad in the newspaper, but two weeks later, there’s still no sign of the mutt. “What did you write in the ad?” his wife asks. “ ‘Here, boy,’ ” he replies.
So that three people can fit in the pickup.
Apéritif: French for "a set of dentures."
T NOW! What do we want? MORE TIME-TRAVEL JOKES! When do we want them? RIGH
We’ve been neighbors for six tumultuous years. When you borrowed my snowblower, you returned it in pieces. When I was sick, you blasted Metallica. And when your dog decorated my lawn, you laughed. I could go on, but I’m… Read More